I’ve no idea when next I’ll hear sprinklers come to life outside my window at 4:30 A.M.. My shelves are barren. Tattered shoelaces dangle from the lip of my kitchen’s trashcan. I sleep atop a faded, blue comforter I intend to get rid of in the morning.
I don’t care how influenced Frightened Rabbit are by The Arcade Fire. They know what waterfalls sound like to the deaf. They feel the rumbling in their bones. Their feet welcome the dampness of the ground. They savor the moisture on their lips, the spray against their fingertips.
There’s treble trickling down the side of the mountain, percussive slaps cascading from nape to heel. There are mids and lows to muffle memory and muddy the past.
It’s the roar of possibility, it is, and Frightened Rabbit feel it where it matters most.
I live in my head. I send myself flowers on special occasions. I slaughter cows in India. I buy $300 worth of champagne flutes not for company, but in order to avoid running the dishwasher for a week. I keep to myself.
Even in my head.
I haven’t always lived there, but something has been missing from my life for the past year, and introspection, imagination, and other ‘i’ words seemed to make more sense than attempting to meet new people.
Which brings me to Marcy, the remarkably wise woman who runs Lost In Your Inbox. When I read what she had to say about friendship it forced me to reflect upon what I considered essential to my stability and wellbeing.
“When I think about it, I realize that the relationships I enjoy the most or the times in my life I remember most fondly are the ones in which I could really be myself. The people with whom I am free to be all aspects of me, no matter how wacky or sad or stupid or sarcastic. I think that’s part of what I long for when I feel like something is missing from my life, those places and people with whom I can let it all hang out.”
This is not to say I haven’t good friends in this town. I do. But those who’ve stood the test of time across thousands of miles? Well, I want those around as well.
I need at least one.
Which is why, now that I’m moving to New York with two of my closest comrades, I feel lighter than I have in months, years even.
I feel happy.
I’m a firm believer in the notion that friends are the family you choose. Speaking of which, the picture above is of our new home. Thank you, Google Maps.
“Talent is luck. The important thing in life is courage” - Woody Allen
Two years ago that line from Manhattan, and one Wilco song (can you guess which one?), inspired me to dedicate my life to film. I’m a filmmaker. Did I ever mention that? This move to New York is the next step, albeit a rather significant one, in a series of inevitable steps.
I assure you this website will do nothing if not reap the many benefits of such a move.
I also flitted between songs in an earnest attempt to marry this announcement to “the sound of opportunity.” In the end, I settled on silence.
This is a moment for heartbeats, both yours and mine.
I’ve lived in Florida my entire life. Here’s to something new, something stupid and magnificent.
